How did I know I was addicted to victimhood?
Well you were givin me pity and it was tastin real good
If I see myself as a helpless child
how could I possibly take care of myself?
That’s most certainly the job of someone else

I’m sittin pretty in my weakness
Why would I want to be a woman?
I’m sittin pretty in my weakness
Why would I want to be a woman?
Can you make my decisions?
So I can blame you if I don’t like the consequences
Can you make my decisions?
So I can blame you if I don’t like the consequences
But now my power’s in a prison
of my own makin…

I’ve got to see with my own eyes
I’ve got to decide with my own mind
I’ve got to feel with my insides
And realize I’ve always been the one drivin

But what about the part of me that feels like a victim,
that is a victim?

I’ve been a victim of my emotions
lost in the chaos of not knowin
I’ve been a victim of my emotions
lost in the chaos of not knowin
Can you see the pain I’ve been through?
Can you see the pain I’ve been through?
Cuz that’s the only way that I can be new for you.

Then I can see with my own eyes
I can decide with my own mind
I can feel with my insides
and realize I’ve always been the one drivin

I’m suffocated by my weakness
I just wanna be a woman
I”m suffocated by my weakness
I just wanna be a woman
and make my own decisions
and be the one to live with the consequences
how do I break out of this prison?
when I’m the one holdin me captive…

Well I’ve been small for a while
how could I be more than a child?
Who cries for her dad
and longs for a memory long dead.
I just wanna hold my teddy bear in my loft bed
I want my stuffed animals to protect me from what’s bad.

I wanna eat chocolate chip cookies before I knew sugar wasn’t good for me
but a woman can’t hide from those things
she sees, so she grieves her childhood
she grieves her ignorance
and her body awakens to the sensations of the violent colors of truth

I’ve been a victim of many losses
tossed in an ocean of grievin
I’ve been a victim of many losses
tossed in an ocean of grievin

If you want to be a woman
then be there for me in my agony
Cuz that’s the only way that I can be new for you

Then I can see with my own eyes
I can decide with my own mind
I can feel with my insides
I’ve always been the one drivin

I’ve always been the one drivin.

Rising out of victimhood