Midwest Christian Family Angst 

Oh I’m so innocent.
I never think about sex. 
Jill, Jill would never wear a tight dress. 
Before you leave the house be sure to cover your chest.
God is good
all the time
All the time
God is good 
god is misunderstood 
all the time 
all the time
god is misunderstood 

so let’s take this thing called “sex”
that is the most natural human thing to do
and make you feel really weird about it
so when you have sex
you feel like something is horribly wrong 
Yeeaaah . . . have fun unwinding that mess.

A murder of crows came from the spirit plane to feast on the carcass of my Christian born shame overlaying my physical frame.
A murder of crows came from the spirit plane to feast on the carcass of my Christian born shame overlaying my physical frame.
A murder of crows came from the spirit plane to feast on the carcass of my Christian born shame overlaying my physical frame.

“Serve others”
oh OK, so God wants me to give of myself to everyone else and abandon my own needs? 
and laugh at people’s jokes I don’t find funny? 
Is that what you mean when you tell me to be more loving? 

“Jillllll, you could help so many people with your god given gifts”
That’s great.
but I’m going to help myself first
and not participate in your glorified sacrificial love. 

I dare to give the gift all to myself
Cuz I know that my greatest gift is my happiness
Cuz I know that my greatest gift is my happiness

And I know if I sell my soul
to endless service 
I’ll be pissed
Off

I am a goddess of self-love.
I fill my cup with tea so I may be warm and happy.
You are welcome to sit at the table and fill your own cup.

I see 
But I do not save.
My power is in being brave 
enough to reveal myself.

I see 
But I do not save.
My power is in being brave 
enough to reveal myself.

A murder of crows came from the spirit plane to feast on the carcass of my Christian born shame overlaying my physical frame.
Now when I go to church with my family it’s because I’m curious to see what mind games they will play.
How will the pastor construct the world today?
I’m sooo glad I found my own way.